I'd rather waste some time with you

Hellllllo yesterday was quite bad. i screwed the auditions, or thats what i thought i did. ohman, i really hope we get in. I was sosososoososososo nervous i sweat like i just played a 70min match without stopping, i promise. aaaaaah, and everyone was like starting at me, ok rather i was selfconsious, but so ! Kent&Joa was sitting on the floors with the guitar with some excuse that the wire wasnt long enough. it seemed as though me and Germaine was the only one performing. aaaaaah. Germaine didnt screw up, all if them didnt! Gail did the best i think. i screwed up the most. i missed so many fill ins and some beats. aaaah, BUT, a big thanks to those that encouraged me - when you guys were sitting on the chairs laughing/talking at me. haha. Okay maybe that didnt happen. but anyw, thanks to those that smiled at me and gave me thumbsup, yes it did help alot. thankyou allll, loves !

Alright so if i did freaked out during audition, WHATS GONNA HAPPEN ON THE REAL DAY,? ohmygoshhh, i cannotcannot think about it. my sister gave me a piece of her mind and i felt disappointed in myself. yes i really did feel like sinking into the ground and disappear. or maybe i could sink into the ground and find someone's confidence OR! my lost confidence. Okay its bigbigbig obvious-ity ( theres no such word) that i cant be on stage for nuts uh! &&, to make it worse. the other two bands that played were good. okay rather the drummer was good. i was only checking the drummer skills. yes and compared to them i kinda stink, boo sam boo. ): okay the real day is on 29june. pleasepleaseplease by then, i really do hope i find my confidence, and i really feel like crying now):

Ok enough..): yes and went home to bath and everything, but i slept alot. haha. i was suppose to meet them at 7 but i only elft at 7, whoopsie. im sorry yayapapaya? went to deck5 and chillchill. atok brough his guitar and i think his amp is sexybaby. woooo.

to everyone: please help me find my confidence?